My son is in love with a foreign...man?

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My son is in love with a foreign...man?

Unread postby willdavis » 2nd August, 2018, 8:12 am

It was always normal for us that my son brings his friends in the house. Sometimes, his friends even spend the night and it was all okay with us. I mean, what could two guys do inside a room, right? They would probably just be playing some video games, watching some movies, and some may watch pornographical videos. That’s normal and I don’t really have a problem with that. That is way better than your son confessing he’s in love with a foreign guy. However, what happened to me was the latter instead of the former. Of course, it all came as a surprise to us. To be honest, I was even outraged. He came home for dinner one night with a foreign guy whom we happily invited for dinner thinking he was a friend of my son. When finner ended, he spilled out the beans that he is gay and the foreign guy is his boyfriend. All this time, we thought he is a man. I just can’t imagine how this happened.
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Re: My son is in love with a foreign...man?

Unread postby SummerIsLife » 2nd August, 2018, 10:56 am

How old is your son and how old is the "foreign guy?" Also what is wrong with a foreign guy? If they are the same age and your son just came out to you then you should accept that.
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Re: My son is in love with a foreign...man?

Unread postby joshe » 2nd August, 2018, 11:03 am

don't be a dick about it
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Re: My son is in love with a foreign...man?

Unread postby Estaphel » 2nd August, 2018, 11:03 am

I really don't think this forum is the right place for you to express that you're angry at your son because he's gay and dating another guy.
I want some tea.
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Re: My son is in love with a foreign...man?

Unread postby Zephyrus » 2nd August, 2018, 11:07 am

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First of all, I'm not sure how old you are, but if you have a son, I expect you're too old to be here, so bye. Secondly, what specifically do you have a problem with: the fact that your son is gay, he's with a foreign person, or both? Ultimately, it doesn't matter because, if you've got an issue with any of those things, you're in the wrong. Him being gay isn't a problem, him being with a foreign person isn't a problem.
Thirdly,
willdavis wrote:All this time, we thought he is a man. I just can’t imagine how this happened.
He is a man. He came out to you as gay. There is nothing that takes more courage and confidence. And imagine it. It happened. You can either shun your son, your own child, for something neither of you can control, or respect him - give him love and support - like a parent should do.
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Re: My son is in love with a foreign...man?

Unread postby ckiwi » 2nd August, 2018, 11:14 am

He is still a man he just is gay and there is nothing wrong with that. You came to the wrong forum to talk about this. There is nothing wrong with being gay he is still your son and he is still the same person. He needs you to love him no matter what and you are his parent and you need to let him be his own person and you can't control him and just tell him you love him because he is blood and blood is so much thicker than water and you only get so many sons in your life
Sincerely, Kiwi
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Re: My son is in love with a foreign...man?

Unread postby Dua Lipa » 3rd August, 2018, 12:38 am

What Tyler said, kinda. Yes he's over the age limit but I think some leniency should obviously be applied and I hope he wasn't banned, if we have the opportunity to have open discourse with the parent of someone much like us and perhaps further educate them and help them understand us/their child then that can only be a good thing. That could be any one of our parents, the fact he came here means he wants to help understanding his son, obviously he could have been less ignorant about it but its likely he's still in shock about this situation that's very new to him.
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Re: My son is in love with a foreign...man?

Unread postby Dua Lipa » 3rd August, 2018, 12:51 am

And even the mans views although they seem terrible to us they probably don't come from a place of hate. All I know is that he is from the US which apart from major cities - anywhere midwest or rural is pretty culturally detached from the rest of America. I see this as a man who in his community interracial/ international dating is not common or present at all, homosexuality isn't something discussed openly and there are rigid expectations of masculinity and manhood. These are all negative things but I don't think him having those views makes him a bad person or father, that's simply what he's been taught. Even the tone of his post suggests his anger/sadness is not because he condemns gays or even hates them but rather because in his mind he had his expectation of how his son would be and overnight it has suddenly changed. All that said he definitely needs to change the way he thinks and he really needs to just talk with his son.
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Re: My son is in love with a foreign...man?

Unread postby willdavis » 3rd August, 2018, 4:29 am

SummerIsLife wrote:How old is your son and how old is the "foreign guy?" Also what is wrong with a foreign guy? If they are the same age and your son just came out to you then you should accept that.


It's against religious doctrine. Should I still accept that?
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Re: My son is in love with a foreign...man?

Unread postby Zephyrus » 3rd August, 2018, 6:32 am

willdavis wrote:
SummerIsLife wrote:How old is your son and how old is the "foreign guy?" Also what is wrong with a foreign guy? If they are the same age and your son just came out to you then you should accept that.


It's against religious doctrine. Should I still accept that?
Yeah. You should accept it. Even if you're religious, most religions are primarily about love and compassion. Despite the fact that homosexuality may be a sin, he's still your son, and deserves your respect and acceptance. :)
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PostThis post was deleted by TheBrunswickian on 4th December, 2018, 8:23 pm.

Re: My son is in love with a foreign...man?

Unread postby MaskedPanda » 4th August, 2018, 1:50 pm

willdavis wrote:
SummerIsLife wrote:How old is your son and how old is the "foreign guy?" Also what is wrong with a foreign guy? If they are the same age and your son just came out to you then you should accept that.


It's against religious doctrine. Should I still accept that?

It is ultimately up to you to make that decision, we can't force you to accept your son. Though are you okay with potentially losing your son over religion because he likes other guys? Also it does depends on what version? sect? (IDK the exact word for it) of the religion you follow some versions(?) have no problems with it.
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Re: My son is in love with a foreign...man?

Unread postby Tim the Great » 10th August, 2018, 10:56 pm

willdavis wrote:It's against religious doctrine. Should I still accept that?


I mean there’s nothing wrong with being gay or being in love with a foreign person, even the Pope says God made gay people the way they are, and still deeply loves them. So I guess that would mean you’re going against the word of God by hating your own son for being gay.
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