Bottoming: A not-so-short guide

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Bottoming: A not-so-short guide

Unread postby Calcifer » 21st February, 2018, 11:04 am

This question comes up a lot, and I'm not sure I've seen it answered in a big 'ole thread so let's see what I can do. Now, this advice is aimed at those fellas who bottom (obviously) but tops, give it a read too. It's nice to know what your partner may or may not have to go through to get ready.

Warning: Some discussion of sex, biology, and shit to follow. Come on guys, it's a guide on bottoming. What did you expect?

So, you want to have sex. Good! Sex is a fun time. I'm sure a lot of you have at least some experience, but a refresher never hurts. As a quick aside, I believe the pleasurable sensation we get from bottoming is an evolutionary response from our bodies trying to get us to shit. Feels good to come out = You do it. Plus that whole prostate thing probably has a bit to do with it.

Getting ready

Now, I'm sure you know the feeling. There's a cute guy you want to see, but you were just born a bottom and you don't want to be embarrassed by any accidents. You've almost certainly heard of prepping or cleaning out, but what does it mean? Do you need to do it?

With everything I'm going to say your mileage may very. This isn't the be all end all goal, and you should find out what works for you. These are general tips.

General preparation

Whether you douche or not (more on that later) these are some good general tips -

  • Drink plenty of water. General life advice really, but your body is like 70% water. Water helps to keep everything running, so drink water y'all.
  • Eat fibre. There is a scale for what your shit is like, between being super hard and super... not hard. A good amount of fibre helps 'increase stool bulk' which is good for things like constipation.
  • Eat your vegetables. Similar to eating fibre as vegetables are a good source of it, but also it's useful for a whole other range of reason
  • Hell in general, a good healthy diet is pretty key to bottoming. Definitely if you don't want to (or can't) douche.

Douching guide:

Wew, this is gonna be something then. Douching at its core is cleaning yourself out with water. Just water, not soap. Not too hot or cold.

There are two main types of cleaning, fast and deep.

  • Takes about 10-30 minutes
  • Useful if you're not planning to have sex for hours, or with anyone too large.
  • Lasts for a couple of hours
  • Cleans out just the rectum

  • Takes 30 minutes - 2 hours
  • Useful if you plan to fuck all night, are into fisting, or want to take truly huge dicks.
  • Lasts a looooooong time.
  • Cleans out the rectum, and a fair bit of the colon (Descending, Sigmoid and Transverse)

General steps

  • First off, go to the toilet. That should always be the first step in cleaning yourself out. Take your time, relax, read a magazine or a book or something. Apparently squatting is good or something, maybe do that. You don't need advice for this really.
  • Get your tool. This can be an enema bulb, a fleet enema, or a specific kind of shower attachment. Personally I recommend a bulb - It's discrete, portable, and cheap.
  • Fill it with lukewarm, plain water. Water that's too hot is gonna burn, water that's too cold will cause cramps. Soap will just burn, don't even think about it.
  • Get some lube and relax.
  • If you're using a shower hose, put it on low pressure so that the water shoots about 5" (Or 10cm) up
  • Fill yourself up with water. About a full bulb, or 5 seconds on the hose is good for shallow cleaning.
  • Do not overfill yourself. That'll irritate the sigmoid, and you may have to do a deep cleaning and that's just effort.
  • Let it out. Ideally in a toilet, you don't want to get shitty water everywhere.
  • Rinse and repeat. Literally. You'll want to do it until the water runs clear.
  • Voila, you're ready for sex.

Once you've done it a few times, you tend to get a pretty good idea of whether you've done enough or not. It feels a little weird your first time, but your body is really good at telling you what's going on.

What to do now that you're ready.

Now, you've prepped. You've gone to see your fella. You've flirted and been coy and you've gone to his bed/room/car/hammock/what have you.

Bottoming tips

  • First things first - You're the bottom, you're in control. If something doesn't feel right, then you can stop. Don't feel pressured if say, the top is really into it.
  • Take your time. If you rush straight into sex, you can damage yourself. Our bodies are kinda fragile down there. Foreplay is pretty useful, it gets you more in the mood, and it relaxes you.
  • Use lube. Seriously. Our bodies are not self lubricating, so we need it to help out. There are three main kinds of lube, but I'll cover them at the end. Use as much lube as it takes to make it easy for you.
  • Be patient. Like taking your time, but when it comes to the actual sex. Ease yourself into it, find a position that works for you. The bottom being on top can tend to help in my experience, but your mileage may vary. In any case, you want to take it slow and steady. If you're new to bottoming, or hell if you haven't done it in a while, then it might take a few minutes (and inches) to really get you back in the mood.
  • It gets easier. Genuinely. As you manage to take more, you get more into it and excited. When it starts feeling good, you'll be able to take a bit more, and soon enough you'll be bouncing like a bunny.
  • RELAX. Sex is meant to be fun and enjoyable. Breathe if you need too, take it at whatever rate you want. The guy you're seeing isn't going to suddenly put his clothes on and leave if you take a few more minutes to get into the swing of things, and those minutes can be the difference between a pleasurable and painful experience.
  • Breathe. I shouldn't be giving you advice on not dying, but you never know. When we get excited, we tend to forget about our breathing sometimes.
  • Try to enjoy the feeling. It'll make everything easier. After that, you're home clear

Now that we have sex covered, let's go over a couple little things.

  • Water-based lube. This is the most common type, and the one you're most likely to use. They last a decent amount of time, they don't interfere with condoms, and they're cheap. However they can dry out, and they can get sticky.
  • Oil based lube. They tend to last longer and are good for long sessions, but they destroy condoms. You don't want shreds of condom inside yourself, it's based. Also they're a nightmare to get out of clothes, and it's expensive.
  • Silicone lube. Sort of a mix, they last a long time, and they're condom friendly. You need less of it than with water based as they don't dry up so easily, but they do also cost more. Also they can be a little tricky to wash off.

-Toys can be a great way to practice before having sex for the first time, although understandably it can be difficult to do so if you aren't out, or not in a position to get them.

-Positioning is important, mix it around a lot.

Finally, and quite importantly:

Sometimes stuff goes wrong. Even with preparation and planning, it might not work out. It can be really embarrassing, but that's somewhat of an occupational hazard. Try not to dwell on it too much, and if your partner isn't a dick then it should be reasonably okay. If something bad does happen, clean up, and if they aren't a hookup then cuddle up with them and watch a movie or something. You can always fuck another day.

Sources used:

Personal experience
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Re: Bottoming: A not-so-short guide

Unread postby Tew » 21st February, 2018, 3:58 pm


My issue is that this all grosses me out a bit. If only humans could be perfect and... clean ;)

Ah well.
*winks at you*
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Re: Bottoming: A not-so-short guide

Unread postby Dolly » 21st February, 2018, 5:07 pm

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Re: Bottoming: A not-so-short guide

Unread postby scottnesss » 21st February, 2018, 8:47 pm

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JonathanT88 wrote:Scottnesss - You'll always be GTF's token narcissist, and don't let any newbie scum tell you differently. You're wonderful, and watching you destroy everyone around you with your sass is very satisfying.
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Re: Bottoming: A not-so-short guide

Unread postby Amadeus » 22nd February, 2018, 9:04 am

Why didn't you post this before I lost my virginity? Oml...
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