Apparently this female azn doc that I have, whom I've trusted to take care of me for about 2 plus years now, turned out to be a Christian, a conservative one at that.
I recently just came out to my mom when I turned 20 (last december) and she did not take it well, but it wasn't as bad as I expected (i.e her kicking me out). She just tells me everyday about how I've disappointed her for becoming gay and how heart broken she is, bla bla bla. I grew up in a Christian family (actually all my other family members are Buddhists, mom converted to Christianity cause of her ex-bf). She has never liked gay people, she always made fun of them. And of course because of this, I have been inclined to come out to her for the past few years.
Anyways long story short, came out to her on my bday, she didn't take it well, she told my doctor about it, and then she lied to me telling me that I have to get my regular check-up. I had a bad feeling about it even before I arrived there, but whatever, I went, and there she was (the doc), looking at me awkwardly and in a condescending manner. She did not waste her time trying to make me feel like shit, she went ahead and said "so I've heard from your mom about YOUR UNACCEPTABLE BEHAVIOR. Now tell me, didn't you say you were a Christian?"
This conversation lasted for about an hour. I talked back against her and she didn't seem to like it.
Skipping forward.. on that day, and a few days later, I got depressed and anxious all of a sudden. I felt betrayed by this doctor whom I've trusted for a while now because she attacked me out of the blue for my sexuality. I mean come on, I know for A FACT that doctors are not allowed (or at least shouldn't) invade someone's privacy life like that and then giving a piece of their mind about it (in a negative way). And more importantly, I cannot believe that my mom did that.

I'm just trying to stay strong and keep being who I really am. Sometimes it's just hard to do so because you never know what those who you love and trust might think about you after they find out about your sexual preference.

I'm not even gonna get into the things that she told me. I'm just trying to forget that. But yeah some of the things that she said made me cringe. Oh and then she came up with this theory. She was like :

Oh .. just imagine a little girl stealing a candy from a box. Her mom saw what the girl did but never confronted her about it because it was not a big deal to her. Because her mom ignored her 'sinful' act (stealing), this little girl kept on stealing more and more candies, and her mother still did not bother about it because on her head she's thinking "Ah, she's just a kid, just let her be. Once she grows older she'll know what's right or wrong". The little girl finally becomes an adult now and because of her mother didn't stop her from her repetitive 'sinful' behavior, she became worse and stole a lot more expensive things. Now compare yourself to that girl. When your mom raised you, maybe she didn't realize some of the 'gay' or 'girly' things that you did, and never really bothered you about it. She kept ignoring it because maybe she thought it was cute. Because she never stopped you from your feminine acts, you did more and more of it and eventually you became gay.

And all the time she was telling me this, I was like :




then i was like

"sorry. I guess I'll try to like vaginas now" and then I just left.

im scared my mom will kick me out or do smthing like this but take me to church becuase she is s Super Christian. She goes by what exactly the Bible says

tell your mom that she needs to stop attacking you cause that is not right and if she wont accept you she should keep her mouth shut.

As I said I turned 20 recently. And I'm afraid not cause I feel like I'm already attached to this bitch b/c of my mom working in the same hospital (and she sometimes works for her too) and insurance issues.
It's kind of a pain in the ass to switch doctors. Before her I had a horrible old conservative Jewish doctor. Forever traumatized tbh.

EXACTLY

She even 'threatened' me to send me out to a Christian private school or a gay-converting class or something of that kind. Thank God I came out to her at this late of my age. Imagine if I had come out to her when I was still a high school teenager? She would've made sure that I fucked a girl before prom night lmfao.

I havent seen her since. If she still lectures me about my sexuality on the next visit , im definitely gonna do something about it. Its ridiculous because she could definitely tell that i was upset and uncomfortable but she kept attacking me. Mental abuse tbh. Fortunately I am an adult and I handle things better. Still got me depressed tho

Are you living in America? If so, report her to the local board of medicine. She has no right to lecture you about the supposed immorality of homosexuality while fulfilling her professional role as a medical doctor. Her religious opinions are not to affect her work, especially not in such a way as to cause you any sort of emotional pain.

I am so lucky, coz no one in my family is reglious (the only thing they believe in is science! ).

But I will not come out to my family, until I am totally financially independent and get a stable job.

I think your mom may have her suspicions. Just sayin'.

This. What a b1tch. I have been trough something similar, but far less sinister.

May I suggest, and this will be difficult and take a long time, that considering the rest of your family are buddhists they'll probably back you up and your mum is a bit of a 'lone ranger' Christian. Go and read up on anything relating to being 'gay' in the bible and try and formulate arguments from that stuff that your mum will find difficult to find answers to. Then, go and ask her why you being gay is such a massive problem, and when the religious stuff starts coming out, I can guarantee she'll use Leviticus 18:22 for a start, give her what the alternative view on those passages are. There aren't that many passages in the bible that openly condemn homosexuality, and often if they do, they are a mistranslation.

Guys the problem is, i would have done that in a heart beat if this doctor was actually a real bitch in real life. She's not. She's a polite and kind doctor and she treats her patients well, even though she can be a bit Chinesey (u know how some chinese ppl get unemotional and cold blooded lol), like when she lectured me. I guess she just 'felt bad' for my mom cause she is a Christian too and she would be 'ashamed' if her son or daughter was gay..

It would be extremely awkward if i reported her or whatever, cause my mom is kinda like friends with her and they both work together. The thing is, its MY OWN MOM that asked her to do this, not like she was gonna do it bc she wanted to... In a way..

Yeah I live in New York.

And the comment about buddhism thing... Yeah basically my mom just outted me to my whole family a few weeks ago when she flew back to indonesia, and by the looks of it, none of them cared except for my mom. Even my uncle and my aunt were supportive of me. And my grandma still loves me.. So..


Yeah christianity can do alot of fucked up thing to really twist ur mentality and make u hate ur own family.. Which is ironic really

I'm so sorry for you... your story is very discouraging for me to come out to society.

Nah man! Don't be! Im sorry if my story discouraged u, but theres good that came out of it too!
It made me a stronger person mentally and it really showed me the true side of the world.. And how you shouldn't really trust someone based on their personality or what you know of. Now that I experienced it first hand to homophobia, I can finally relate to those who got bullied and made fun of or lectured for being gay. I am definitely not defeated trust me. I may feel like shit sometimes but time heals. Friends and support help you to get through these tough times.

I wouldn't trust your doctor at all. She's allowing her faith's subjectivity to interfere with her medical objectivity. That makes her dangerous. It's irrelevant how nice and polite a person she is to others. In fact, you should complain to her senior. Behaviour like hers is completely unacceptable. Keeping her as your doctor just for convenience is stupid.

Every time your mum picks on you, reflect it back. "I'm disappointed in having a mother who's love for her son is conditionally gauged by her faith."

But you're burying your head in the sand to avoid conflict. You're 20. Grow some balls and stand up for yourself. Might not make life easier, and people are going to hear things they're trying to shut themselves off from, but you'll feel a lot better for it. For your happiness, you need to be a little selfish.

Except that I have, many times. Thats how I'm still standing strong until now. My mom is unlike any other trust me. Sometimes she can be a nice mom but on the other hand she can be a nasty bipolar psychotic bitch who likes to mentally abuse you just because she thinks you deserve it.

I actually told my bro and my mom that im planning to report the doc to the department because what she did to me was unacceptable.
Both my mum and my bro defended her and they said that what she told me was right and that i've just been brainwashed by gay people and blablabla. I even talked to my therapist about this. He gave me an advice which I have heard from so many ppl: get away from ur mom.

My mom and my bro are really ignorant people. Like literally they would justifying killing people if theyre a Muslim or something.. They can always justify shit if they believe its right. Thats how twisted my fam is. If they think 2+2=5, theres no way telling them otherwise. Theyre stubborn as a rock

You have to report her, she could go on to say the same thing to someone much younger and vulnerable. As i'm sure you're aware, your mum is an idiot, as is your brother. If you can get away from them like your therapist said then do so!

This summer if all goes according to plan

I am positively sure that I was, am, and will be the only person she lectured about being gay lol. I dont see her doing it to someone else. Its bc my mom is a crazy bitch and she asked her to talk me out of it