So ive been reading stuff on this page for ages without actually making a user-
And now i figured it was time to do it cuz 5 years of wtf is this bullshit is enough for me
What is this bullshit you ask? Yeah let me tell you-
I am biologically born as a girl- which does not make me feel right- in a long periode i thought then i had to be transgender cuz like if i wasnt comfortable being a girl i had to be a boy- but no- that wasnt right for me either- sure i feel more comfortable looking boyish, but i have no desire to change my given gender--
This gave me problems with my sexuality as well- one problem seldom comes alone-
Well in 7th-9th grade i was like most 'girls' having crushes on guys- but those days are over- ive now had a girlfriend and im pretty sure that romantically i can better see myself with a girl. I find girls attractive and yeah thats pretty much it. I have no desire to actually touch a girl in anyway and straight/lesbian porn kinda scares the fuck out of me- dont ask me why cuz i have no clue-
Which is why i watch gay porn- guys are great k- but the thing is i do like watching that- but i have no intentions of actually doing anything like that (if it was possible). I also write gay romance and somehow this seems to like be what i prefer as romantic shit. But that makes me question if i have no chance of actually finding something/someone/anything which will 'suit' me.
Ive considered the fact that i might be asexual, but then i dont get why i enjoy writing/watching/reading shit like that.
Anyways i generally have absolutely no interest of engaging myself in a sexual act- but on the other hand i feel like thats just because i dont feel comfortable being like i currently am- i came to this conclusion due to the fact that i actually did want to 'please' my girlfriend- but have no desire to 'fully' be involved in it.
Woop woop- someone enlighten me wtf is wrong with my head
If ive confused you in anyway about wtf im saying- youre welcome