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For post #This post was deleted by Will on 6th April, 2013, 12:42 am.
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Unread postPosted: 19th April, 2013, 1:48 pm 
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Thank you so much! I found this very usefull :D


  
 
Unread postPosted: 2nd July, 2013, 1:06 pm 
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This is a link to a Terrence Higgins Trust thing on finding the right condom for you, because having the right one can make sex safer.

https://www.startswithme.org.uk/en/fits ... wTest=true

It's aimed at English people, but if you say that you are English when you're not, nothing happens, though you might not be able to get the brand of condom they suggest.


  
 
Unread postPosted: 4th August, 2013, 2:20 pm 
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Thanks.. This is what i'm looking for. :keke:


  
 
Unread postPosted: 23rd August, 2013, 3:27 pm 
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Why would anyone have sex under eighteen anyway? Not only is it illegal (not that that says anything about its moral meaning), but it's also disgusting. I'm really not sure why the idea terrifies the living daylights out of me, but it does. Teenagers shouldn't even know sex exists. I'm ashamed I do. They should be focussed on falling in love, finding their soul mate. Sex is supposed to come after - and solely within the bounds of - marriage. If people just saved their virginity for their soul mates and waited until marriage, like they're supposed to, condoms would be completely unnecessary, now wouldn't they?


  
 
Unread postPosted: 23rd August, 2013, 3:38 pm 
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darkangel91 wrote:
Why would anyone have sex under eighteen anyway? Not only is it illegal (not that that says anything about its moral meaning), but it's also disgusting.

For most members here that's not true. Eighteen's on the high end for the age of consent.

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If people just saved their virginity for their soul mates and waited until marriage, like they're supposed to, condoms would be completely unnecessary, now wouldn't they?

Don't quote me on this, but I think straight people engage in something called "vaginal intercourse," which, depending on the woman's age, could still necessitate protection. Maybe, though, you're aware of this fact and have fascinating new information to tell me.


  
 
Unread postPosted: 23rd August, 2013, 4:11 pm 
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darkangel91 wrote:
Why would anyone have sex under eighteen anyway?

Because teenagers are people too. Puberty occurs far before 18, and it's normal for teenagers to be horny and search for a outlet for their sexual frustration. 18 is not some magical age where suddenly people develop sexual desires, and it certainly does not mean they are mature. 18 is simply an arbitrary number; many people are psychologically ready for sex way younger, and others are still immature idiots at 18.

darkangel91 wrote:
Not only is it illegal (not that that says anything about its moral meaning), but it's also disgusting.

As Sullivan said, the age of consent is not 18 worldwide, and just because something is illegal does not mean it is a bad thing. It's illegal to smoke marijuana in many places, and yet marijuana has been proven to have many positive effects on its users. It's illegal to jaywalk, but if there are no cars coming (or if there is a shady-looking guy behind you), there's absolutely no reason to stand at an intersection for several minutes waiting for the little green man to tell you to walk. The law does not always know best.

darkangel91 wrote:
I'm really not sure why the idea terrifies the living daylights out of me, but it does.

You sound like an anti-gay protester. There is absolutely nothing wrong with two consenting individuals engaging in a completely natural and enjoyable sexual experience with each other. Your fear of sex has zero bearing on anyone other than yourself. It sounds to me like you suffered some form of sexual abuse when you were younger which jaded your entire view of sex.

darkangel91 wrote:
Teenagers shouldn't even know sex exists. I'm ashamed I do. They should be focussed on falling in love, finding their soul mate.

Why should they remain oblivious to a basic biological urge? Because some crazy man in the sky said so? Because someone touched you when you were younger? Sex is hardly different from any other pleasurable activity, it simply has been stigmatized by centuries of religious teachings. There is no reason to shield teenagers from sex, particularly because they will try it anyway -- The point is to not remain oblivious to the risks and importance of safe sex.

What does love have to do with anything? If people want to experiment, let them. Your warped morals have zero bearing on what other people should or should not be doing, and, in fact, your views would be a serious danger to society if they ever came to be a reality.

Why would you be ashamed that you know sex exists? You have some serious personal issues you should resolve before they damage you further.

darkangel91 wrote:
Sex is supposed to come after - and solely within the bounds of - marriage.

Says who? Why? What is so important about arbitrarily signing some document that certifies your relationship? What would you do if you married someone who couldn't get it up in the bedroom? Marriage is not some infallible construct: Millions of people still have sex outside of marriage, and millions more get divorced because of sexual or personal reasons. Sex isn't supposed to come at a certain time... It's something that both involved parties decide to have when they feel comfortable with each other. If it takes until marriage for you to trust someone (and what changed other than a little piece of paper?!) then you have serious trust issues.

darkangel91 wrote:
If people just saved their virginity for their soul mates and waited until marriage, like they're supposed to,

Okay, now you're just batshit insane. Soul mates don't exist. Sure, you can find someone who you would like to spend the rest of your life with, but they are not some magical missing part of you. How does marriage reaffirm that someone is your "soul mate"? It's all a load of bullshit. Why should people repress their natural desires until some silly ceremony happens? You sound like an ultra-right-wing Christian lunatic.

darkangel91 wrote:
condoms would be completely unnecessary, now wouldn't they?

NO. NO. NO. There are so many things wrong with this. Sexually transmitted diseases can easily still exist, and just because your partner claims to be exclusive with you doesn't mean he is. Sexual infidelity still exists, and until you have been with someone for an extensive period of time and feel they are entirely trustworthy, it would be silly to not use a condom.

For heterosexual relationships, not using a condom risks STDs AND getting pregnant -- An unwanted and horrible consequence of having sex. The world is overpopulated enough as it is, we don't need more idiots procreating unnecessarily. Why should people have a kid every time they want to get their rocks off? Many people cannot support children, don't like children, or already have too many children. Birth control and abortion are wonderful things that offer people important choices in their lives. They help keep unwanted children from suffering after they are born, while still allowing people who want children to have them.

There are so many things wrong with this last statement, I don't even know where to start. You should go join the Catholic church, since their views are essentially as backwards and fucked up as yours. In fact, you should ask one of the priests to fuck you; I hear they like that sort of thing, and you could certainly use a sexual release or two.


  
 
Unread postPosted: 23rd August, 2013, 5:46 pm 
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darkangel91 wrote:
Why would anyone have sex under eighteen anyway? Not only is it illegal (not that that says anything about its moral meaning), but it's also disgusting. I'm really not sure why the idea terrifies the living daylights out of me, but it does. Teenagers shouldn't even know sex exists. I'm ashamed I do. They should be focussed on falling in love, finding their soul mate. Sex is supposed to come after - and solely within the bounds of - marriage. If people just saved their virginity for their soul mates and waited until marriage, like they're supposed to, condoms would be completely unnecessary, now wouldn't they?

Holy fuck, this is the stupidest thing I've read in years.


  
 
Unread postPosted: 23rd August, 2013, 8:41 pm 
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Very informative post! :thumbsup:

But I can't seem to find the answer I'm searching for, so I'll just ask. What if both partners are healthy and don't have any disease or anything like that and have bareback sex? Is that still dangerous?


  
 
Unread postPosted: 23rd August, 2013, 9:48 pm 
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Oh dear. As usual people misunderstand me. It's kind of funny actually.

Of course there's no "old man in the sky" deciding stuff. My distaste for sexuality does not come from abuse; I have never been abused. It does not come from some dumb religion; I respect the parts of Christianity that are good morals, but I'm an atheist! My dislike of it is that it's a basically selfish thing, it devalues everything and everyone it touches. When you're horny, a person's not a person anymore; they're meat. Nothing but an object of desire. Not a person. And I couldn't care less about some piece of paper. Marriage, by my definition, is the sacred - in and of itself, not because some religion says it is - act of vowing to love one and one only person for the rest of your life, intimately, alone with them. I think weddings are absurd - such an intimate thing should be something you do alone. But that's not the point. Marriage is the act of devoting yourself to one and only one person, and they to you.

Yes soul mates do exist - they're called "the BEST ACHIEVABLE mate, given all available circumstances." Meaning, they're the best you're gonna get. There's no lord in the sky saying, "you two gonna get married, bitches, so there!" It's a matter of, for every person on earth, there is one person who they have a chance of actually meeting and befriending who would make a better love than anyone else possibly could, given the constraints of the circumstances. Also known as a SOUL MATE.

Sex, as I said, is innately selfish. But love is innately selfless; true love is devotion to another, not because of their body, or their mind, or even necessarily their personality, though all of those things are a part of it; it is a devotion to them for their own sake, for that mysterious mix of qualities which make them a unique individual. Sure, immature lovers are more about desiring to possess one another; that's why they're called immature. That's infatuation, not true love. As they say, if you truly love someone, you should be willing to set them free. True love is willing to do whatever it takes, to sacrifice anything, to do what's best for the one you love. That, simply by its very nature, is exalted and sacred. But sex shall never be anything other than a bestial urge which can never be satisfied - an addiction, an endless craving that, if indulged, will only grow stronger. Sure, I get horny. But I remind myself that whatever sex evolved for (as David Hume said, ought cannot be derived from is, so it doesn't matter what sex evolved for), it OUGHT to be used as the final, perfect cherry on top of true, forever-devoted love between two individuals who would sacrifice anything for eachother, and whose love may not be perfect, and who may greatly annoy one another at times, but who will stick together for ever. Treating it as a plaything is disrespectful to oneself and to the very idea of devoting everything that is in you, saving everything that is in you - including your first taste of what truly is the most sublime physical experience - to them, for one person, and one person alone.

And yes, I know that condoms are necessary to prevent STDs and pregnancy! Duh! But unless you or your mate is born with an STD, if you give your virginity to the same person who gives their virginity to you, there's no possibility of disease! As for when there is an STD or the chance of pregnancy, obviously condoms are necessary. All I'm saying is, they would not be AS necessary as they are, if only people would practice abstinence and faithfulness instead.

As for teenagers sometimes being psychologically mature enough for it, hogwash. Teenagers jump from one mate to another over very short periods of time. If they can keep the same mate for several years and vow to love one another forever, then yes, feel free. But that is not what they are being taught. They are being taught to fuck for fuck's sake, rather than for love's sake. They are being taught that the fleeting moment of sexual pleasure is somehow valuable in and of itself, rather than the lifetime of relative contentment that true, deep love can and often does bring. They are being taught that their only value as human beings lay in their dicks and breasts and vaginas and assholes, rather than in their SOULS. And you see how modern society has crumbled since the hippies in the sixties "liberated themselves." I'm not against hippies or the New Age, per se. But what they did, and what poor innocent kids are still doing today, is not liberating themselves - only true love can do that. They are enslaving themselves to sexuality itself. And that makes me very sad.

Perhaps this may shed some light for you.


  
 
Unread postPosted: 23rd August, 2013, 9:52 pm 
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Nothing is selfless, in the end even love and friendships are forged with the ultimate goal of happiness.


  
 
Unread postPosted: 23rd August, 2013, 9:53 pm 
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darkangel91 wrote:
Why would anyone have sex under eighteen anyway? Not only is it illegal... but it's also disgusting.

darkangel91 wrote:
Teenagers shouldn't even know sex exists.

darkangel91 wrote:
Sex is supposed to come after - and solely within the bounds of - marriage.

darkangel91 wrote:
If people just saved their virginity for their soul mates and waited until marriage, like they're supposed to, condoms would be completely unnecessary, now wouldn't they?

Help, I can't choose my favourite quote. :rofl:

EDIT: Never mind!


  
 
Unread postPosted: 23rd August, 2013, 10:04 pm 
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Wow, you're deranged. I can't be bothered to respond to that drivel, but maybe someone else can.

LOL Will.


  
 
For post #This post was deleted by Simon on 20th January, 2016, 7:39 pm.
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Unread postPosted: 24th August, 2013, 3:12 pm 
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I know sex isn't a magical be all end all. That's why I find it troublesome. It should be.

But you see, you're one of these people who's so in love with their idea of the "real world" that they don't care about ideals. Who cares what love really is or what sex really is? What's important is what they should be, and how to make them so if they are not already. Sex has nothing to do with love. And love doesn't cure everything. But sex should be secondary to love, its ultimate culmination, and love should cure everything. Who cares what IS. Let us pretend that things are as they SHOULD BE, and in the pretending, make them so. As the old proverb goes,

"Pretense becomes reality."

Faerytales and romance books exist for a reason. They are an as-yet unrealized ideal. But the only value in life comes from bringing ideals closer to realization, and enjoying the ideals that already have been; bringing beauty into the world to redeem and replace the ugliness, and enjoying the beauty that is already here; making the world more magical and less mundane, and enjoying the magic that is already all around us. Children do those things all the time; they simply have trouble living in the real world because they are too focussed on Dreams. Many adults, however, seem to be the other way around: blinded and numbed by the pain and imperfection of "reality" to see the beauty and truth of Dreams. The truth of the matter, as always, lies between those opposing extremes. Instead of allowing real life to hold a tyranny over you, to blind you to ideals, try thinking - just once every day - that whatever the "real world" may be, it is nothing without perfect ideals to strive for. True love is one of those things; the idea of eternal devotion to one person is one of those things; hell, even the idea of goodness itself is such an ideal. They would not be valuable if they were automatically a part of the world. We have to fight for them. Nothing truly valuable is easy to attain. Similarly with love and the like. Instead of hating them for being rare and difficult to attain, and thus, to a mind infatuated with the idea that nothing that isn't already part of the "real world" could possibly be valuable, try valuing ideals all the more BECAUSE they are not YET real.

I know I'm not going to get through to you; it is not possible to win an argument with someone convinced of his own correctness, which is why no one has ever won an argument against me. I only hope that someone out there who reads this, who is perhaps more open-minded, will be inspired by my words to reconsider their view of what "reality" really means. For what really is the point of living in an imperfect world without perfect ideals to strive for, and forever grow closer to? That, as far as I can tell, is the only source of value in life.

Thank you, by the way, for your intelligent and well-considered arguments. It is very fun having a bit of good-natured dialectic on important philosophical concepts. I don't get to do that very often.


  
 
Unread postPosted: 24th August, 2013, 3:20 pm 
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By the way - whenever I hear someone talk about how they are "comfortable with their sexuality," what I hear is "I am nothing but a piece of meat for others to play with, and I pretend I'm comfortable treating myself this way and replacing love, which is satisfying, with sex, which is an insatiable desire and thus inherently unsatisfying, even though in reality I have no self-esteem and I hate my living guts."

Just a little thought for you all to consider.


  
 
For post #This post was deleted by Simon on 20th January, 2016, 7:39 pm.
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Unread postPosted: 24th August, 2013, 5:06 pm 
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DanDan wrote:
Cut down with the arrogance. No one has "won" an argument with you because your stupid self just posts messages of "should." Sex SHOULD be second to love. Sex SHOULD be treasured. You give no reasons as to why they these should matter. Your posts are all idealistic bullshit that only matter to you. They are all empty claims. You respond to nothing. You just parrot your same shit continuously. It isn't even worth the effort.

Like I said, if you want to look at sex in a certain way, then you do so. Don't, I repeat, DO NOT lower other people because they don't follow your narrow-minded bullsht. Don't call people pieces of meat. You be scared of your own sexuality, no one has to be as irrational.

I want to have meaningless, empty sex with you :heart:


  
 
For post #This post was deleted by Simon on 20th January, 2016, 7:39 pm.
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